My Butt is the Reason God Invented Ice Packs

@#$&! skateparks!!! I always said I wouldn't go to skateparks with all of those damn little kids and have some little kid knock me down. Well, guess what? I was at the skatepark. You know the rest. I didn't get knocked down so much as I had to decide whether to take a slam or slam this kid (and use him as my landing pad). Being a mom, I opted for the former. My tailbone is cursing me as I type. It's not broken, just unhappy.

Yesterday, Malba was teaching me how to carve a corner. I loved that. At some point, he said we would do the "big lap" around this skatepark. You have to generate a lot of speed to make it happen. He skates with me the entire way, reminding me of what I need to do at the different transitions and banks before sending me up and over some coping. Well, you really have to haul ass to get over that coping. And we were hauling. He'd already verbally warned everyone to clear out for a bit. And then this little kid, the one with the selective hearing, bailed his skateboard right in front of us when we were going Mach 5. Stupid estrogen! A mom will sacrifice herself rather than mow down a child. I also didn't want to kill Malba. So I took the slam, a hard one.

I stayed on the ground for a bit trying to decide whether I was hurt or just hurting. My tailbone was not amused at all. Broken? Fractured? Nah. I was alive and relatively well. I got up quickly once I realized I was just hurting.

Next time though, someone's little tubby kid may have to be sacrificed. He will bounce. Kids always do. Old ass grown-ups do not.

(No, I'm not going to stop skating. Slams come with the territory!)